Labels: quandary
(super Long Post)
I caught a cold one week ago and it hasn't recover. A div is over and I don't have any excuses for not studying. Though we had lost but juz like what Ms zhou said.."我们输得漂亮".. Now then I understand why do ppl always said that U need to rest when u got a flu. LOl..no wonder my cold is still here..haha
Something happened so fast so that I've yet to react and it's over. (?????) It took me a day to figure out and then I realised that I'm like an idiot. FINE! Just take it as I've gotten the wrong message and make a wrong turn. Feel perturbed for e past 3 to 4 days so... abit unhappy. I feel a bit uneasy, heart aches a bit but it only lasted for 4 days....
And for the 5th day which is today.. I started laughing. (why?) It's hilarious hahhaha coz I'm being treated like an idiot! Well, feeling this kind of thingy.. easy come easy go. Compared to that period of time when senior left, the degree of unhappiness is way lesser and insignificant.
I tried very hard to squeeze some tears out in the past four days, hoping that this can help to reduce my "stress". But basically, all that were in my mind are getting numb, sleepy, phys spa spa spa...geo essay and statistics..ZZz
I know I'll get better eventually. And so as usual I took a deep breath in and took a step back to get myself out from those stupid things that I've once blindly persisted.
Being an idiot like this for once is more than enough.
My former injury at my left ankle is aching..this is worst then my elbow! I think I really have to get my ankle fixed but I don't want to wrap it to sch..it's way too ugly lol. In addition, my health deteriorated since starting of the year. First is kena food poisoning and then fever flu fever flu.. like never ending. Most importantly, I'm worried that I'll fall sick for actual A lvl. For which I always do (for major exams). Is either I fall sick few wks or days before if not it will be on actual day.
ARHH I can't stress this any further. Geo is the first paper for A lvl exam and this indicates that if I don't start NOW, I'm gonna suffer. For now..I'm very stressed. I try not to show it...I'm trying. I'm really trying very hard not to cry(again) coz I'm sick of it. Hai..big girl don't cry yea???
Urmmm I think I'll vomit everything out all at once coz I dont feel like blogging for perhaps the nxt few wks.
Human nature really disgusted me. So much so that I feel like vomiting whenever I...(shan't mention it) Anyway..I feel as if I'm sinking again.. Alas, juz sink la.. I'm so tired. Bye.
Labels: quandary
Hmmm I'm a little longwinded this week..but still I have to type all these out coz I wldn't have a chance to do so nxt week(busy). The atmosphere in sch was tense, friends around ain't doing good in different aspects. Some in studies some in relationships. I got this very uncomfortable and helpless feeling, it's just like I'm standing in the middle and everyone is changing n moving while I'm the one staying constant. Ya, my life is still quite peaceful at this moment but I have this hunch that things won't be so smooth for me(I'm sure about it).
By observing theirs' emotion that varies so much, I feel so useless coz all I can say to my friends are only those comforting words. After all I've been through all those unhappy times and gotten over it, that's why I understood that is too hurtful to lose something especially out of the unexpected one.
Some gotten the feeling to love again, some stay in their memories and choose to reminisce it. Me?? Hahaha don't know. I'm afraid that I'll become numb.. If I really do then I won't be able to feel any joy, life will become meaningless. Hai..suddenly feel so lost. Have I reach a point of stagnation?
I can't differentiate what's real and what's not. It's too unreal, so unpredictable and so uncertain. Perhaps it's best that I don't move. Everything will be sorted out if it really meant to be the way it is.
Damn, why is everyone so emotional these few days? Juz stay alive and healthy that's more than enough. Hahaha though school life is getting more and more stressful but every laughter I had these few weeks are real.
PS: Can love be revive if it is dead?
希望-薛凯琪
给我最后的微笑好不好
眼泪也不是解药你知道
担心你以后要一个人走爱变伤口天长地久
时间有尽头
总能够再回首变温柔
千言万语难开口
还压在眉头却要放开手
忘了多余的内疚
别忘了爱过就已足够
没有不了的情缘
总会有人要先走
忘了动摇的时候
别忘了泪水不会白流
没有不了的拥有确有回味在心头
最终会变醇酒
To my love that is dead.
Labels: quandary
I've this habit of cleaning up my room whenever I need to sort my thoughts out. In other words, I'm not in a good mood. So my room had been dust free for quite a few weeks. ZZz
I got this hunch that something bad is gonna happen. I don't know what is it but should be happening in few months time. I'm pretty sure coz this is not the first time I'm having such uncomfortable feeling.
K, phys theory-All or nothing. Sound so familiar to how I live my life. I don't like things that are half done, I don't like things that ain't belong to me. If I am suppose to snatch it or compete with others I would rather let go. I want something that fully belongs to me. I don't know.. perhaps that's one of the Scorpio's characteristic.
Recent updates
-stressed up by school work esp the up coming actual A lvl phys SPA A.
-quite tired coz A div is nxt wed.
-pissed off coz phys is getting tougher. Normally I won't spend more than a wk or so to get the concepts right but this time....hmmm